POP OH!

4 MONTHS of BMT with bae and is finally coming to an end! Not only baby is a winner on getting thru BMT but hell yes, I am a winner as well for being able to stay loyal and always loving bb no matter how tough it has been for the both of us. All I am looking forward to is tomorrow where bae's gonna fetch me from school after my finance test which requires only 50 minutes of my time and that is way lesser than the travelling time from home to school. 😪 Despite the fact that bb's done with BMT, and we're both so so happy(already have plans to be out to Jaybee for food hunting haha), I won't be able to watch bae's POP marching thingy, because of the limited tickets. Sucks but at least I get to set his army photo as my screen wallpaper. (Obsessive girlf) 😏 

Very short post tonight because I am sooooooo exhausted tonight for sleeping late the whole week, all thanks to my sister who needed my help with accounting every single night! 

Goodnight!!! 

Embracing..

Embracing what? Embracing the fact that babe's having BMT and wouldn't be able to spend so much time with me, even on special events. You were supposed to be attending mother's surprise birthday party but all thanks to field camp, you couldn't. Surprisingly, quite a number of guests were asking me about you, bae. Even mother was finding for you once she had her blindfold opened. It sucks but hey, there are more opportunities for such events, bb. I can't deny that I have been missing you so much the past few days but alhamdulillah sayang, the activities that I had the past few days filled up my days without you. I'm not saying I've been fine without you since I'm all busy, but I feel so much less lonely and negative when I'm outside, socialising with people, knowing that, some are even having a harder time as compared to me.. 

I met a few new people in my life, and it has definitely been a blessing in disguise. This whole week, I interacted with 7 new people in Woodlands area and also school. I have no idea why bb but most of them shared stories about their personal lives with me. It was shocking because personally, I don't wish to share much with people that I barely know but alhamdulillah, perhaps they feel comfortable with me. Definitely felt honored about it though.. 😆

2 more days to go, bae and I will be hearing from you again bb! Monday is all about lectures and work while Tuesday is all about a lecture, lessons and production.. It's gonna be fast for me, bb and I will plan a surprise for you, okay bae? I love you, sayang ~

Long gone

Hello, everyone! MIA for more than a month all because of my hectic schedule. SCHOOL HAS BEGUN! YAP, as much as I am super excited to learn new things, get through the assignments, projects like a regular student, I can't deny that I'm sort of not looking forward to it because this just means, LESS SLEEP! 😟 But, I'm pretty sure I could handle it well, I guess. Hahaha!

My definition of BUSY just means......

Lectures, assignments, projects, finals...
Production training, rehearsals...
Teaching in the evening...
Accounts Assistant in the afternoon....
Sakura on SOME days.. (really seldom since its super flexi)

I am still contemplating about the dance classes with Amal and Dinz tho. So, THAT, too, will be in my list of busy.

I have to say that, the past 1 month, it has been a super interesting month for me, knowing that bae's been doing well in Army, 4 minutes for SOC and HENCE, booking out at 11am tomorrow guiseeee! SAPPPPPPP! Hahahaha! Did we fight? Yes, we did. Once. Tak gaduh, tak sah. Come on, its NS. #inisemuanormal But, if you fight with your man EVERY SINGLE DAY, thats, just.. Toxic. GETOUT. Any differences with bae? Definitely!! Alhamdulillah, he's becoming more understanding and soft spoken? How do I put this... Hm, for instance, when we had a fight previously, he was more of a calm person? He didn't really go all crazy mad, instead, he replied with a calmer tone. Maybe, he was too tired to continue the argument. So, yap, I love how he's calmer than usual, hes handling problems so much better. And, he's a much more clingy man, always confessing his love to me and that is so very rare of him. So, I guess, for now, NS has changed him in such a way. A GOOD WAY. Alhamdulillah. As for me, I'm so used to how everything is for me now. School, work, meeting my girls, production. There's a lot on my plate but I am thankful because everyday, without fail, Im able to smile even when bae is not physically here with me. But when he does...... I go all smiley, guise, like, even my face can't fit the smile that I have when I see him. Hahaha!

For the past 1 month, I've learnt something uh guise. To not expect much from anyone even if you already given your best to them. No, this has got nothing to do with my boyfriend. In case you guys are wondering. I love friends. I love making friends. New ones. No bad intentions, just, forging new friendships with people. But, some people are just so full of negativity and whatever good intentions you have, it will never be understood by the other party. I am adulting and I definitely don't wish to argue with anyone just because they have something that I don't, or just because they are someone that I can never be. At this age, all I pray for is lasting friendships, a responsible husband, a happy family, a good career and happily ever after in the Hereafter. So, I'm gonna keep my head strong and not let people bringing me down like how they wish I would be.. Whatever it is, it's your loss for thinking bad of me when in the first place all I hoped for is to be someone that you could talk to as a friend. But now, it changed my perception of you and I will never want to associate myself with someone like you. Because, really, "Aint nobody got time fo you"

Till then,
happily girl wishing everyone a good day ahead and PLEASE stay positive and avoid negativity AT ALL TIMES 😆

A MONTH OF NS

Hi, guys! Im going for the mak ciks line now. Pejam celik pejam celik, dah sebulan NS berlalu. HAHAHA! But really. A month of NS and we are still surviving. Time flies real fast, tbh. Just to share how everything is now. Alhamdulillah, he had his leave last Thursday night onwards. And will be booking in tmr night. Tonight will be the last night for us to go all mushy mushy before both of us get to work again. Just to share with you guys how our 1 month has been throughout this NS phase.

In a month, we had a misunderstanding TWICE. Yes, twice. The first fight, he was so cool about it that we reconciled after 5 minutes? In fact, we didn't even had any fights. He basically knew I was a little sad(for an unreasonable reason) and managed to put a smile on my face right after that. The second fight, which is today. HAHAHA! But again, he managed to go all "Babe, tonight, 8pm we go dinner again okay? Tang Tea House" and how could I say no to that? HAHAHA! Basically, we fought for the MOST COMMON NS FIGHT EVER. Time. Yes, time. Me, being clingy (can't help it right? Girls, we are like that. We are born this way), just needed his time for myself. A day isn't enough but, I realised I was being.. Unappreciative. It's normal, I guess. Heard it from my girlfriends how such fights would occur but no worries, our man is able to handle our clingyness, unreasonableness no matter what, all thanks to NS. No matter how childish he was before NS, but right after he undergo this phase, whatever fights yall have, they will probably chase us back and manja us like there's no tmr. BUT, don't ever take them for granted. As much as it hurts to only spend a day with him, I will have to stop being an ass, and understand bae's schedule, energy, and time.

In case you guys are wondering how our love is right now.. It's getting stronger and stronger. Trust me. This is in fact how my girlfriends' relationships are too. We are more understanding, more appreciative and more loving. Some peeps told me that their relationships got shaky and about to crumble down anytime soon. But some also told me how their relationship got better and better. All I can say is, it depends. It depends how in love you both are with each other. It takes 2 hands to clap. If you're the only one fighting for the relationship and the other goes "meh..", don't think it can work, right? What I feel is, NS is like a test to our relationship. It shows whether we would still stay and fight for each other or one of us would simply give it up and move on. It's sad but at the same time, it's healthy because NS strengthens your relationship. On the other hand, it removes toxic relationships as well.

Till then, we are still standing strong, and looking forward to the days to come.
Insya Allah..

Still keeping track

Third week of BMT and I really feel sorry for my baby. First 2 weeks, the conversations we had were all within 35 mins but now, 15 mins, guys. Thats how exhausted my baby is. I am completely fine with us communicating for only 15 mins since it's actually more than enough to share how our day was. Cause, all I do is work. Every. Single. Day. Nothing much except that I'm getting lots of money. HAHAHA! According to him, sergeant are all now tekan-ing them. I could hear one of them screamed while I was on the line with bae. Sergeant, please, chill. But, I understand. Camp is the only place that you guys have power. Right? (sarcasm at its best) Tbh, I hate the way they abuse their power. (My bro's a regular army but he is such a chill chill guy. Reasonable, humble and alhamdulillah, he got a higher position now) So, why are all this sergeant baru nak naik buat kecoh. So much of taking care of your men. But then again, tekan-ing in camp has become a tradition from generations to generations. But please, don't try to imitate U.S army style of training. (insert facepalm emoji, if there is one)

So, after all my ranting here. I ain't gonna be that girl, being angry at my man for not able to communicate with me for 35 mins. Fasting and doing all these training, not enough sleep, is wearing him off. If I were him, I'd probably go AWOL. Now, you know why I'm born as a woman. Because, we, women, run when things get hard. HAHA :P

If you're reading this bb, I want you to know, I am still here, loving you and I am not going to give up up until you get through this phase, okay? Nobody said NS is easy but we adjust to it and make do with whatever we have okay. I won't want to make things even difficult for you. I want to be that girl you will always want to go home to..

See you REAL soon, my soldier..

1st book out day

Hi, guys! Yesterday was bae's first book out day after 2 weeks confinement in BMT. I finally had a strong reason to doll myself up. Bb was really looking good, on the bike, despite the fact that he's botak now. Before he arrived at my place, I was sooooo nervous, my heart was pumping so hard and I couldn't stop smiling. It was like our first date all over again.... 😍

To be honest, the 2 weeks were okay. Only the first few days were hard and the last few days were hard. First few days, not used to it and last few days, it felt sooooo long for bae to book out. HAHAHA! I just feel like these 2 weeks was like a test for us. To see whether if we would still be there for each other after the 2 weeks. I'm just so in love with bae that talking to anyone besides him, wouldn't make me feel better at all. I guess, at the end of the day, it is all about how strong your love is for someone. And knowing that being loyal is not a duty or an obligation but its a choice. Well, today, is another day of spending some time with bae. Even if it is only a few hours shopping for his army stuffs and we will be back home for our first breaking fast with our families at home 💓

I love you and I still love you, Kamarul Arriffin 💋

4 more days

Hi, guys! 4 more days to go to bb's first book out! Yes, I am sooo eggcited. Alhamdulillah, 11 days without bb is not that bad actually. Can't deny though that the first 3 days was quite bad. It took us 3 days to be fine. I guess, thats the average number of days for us to get used to a new routine?

2 weeks confinement is ending soon and I guess, these 2 weeks should be one of the toughest stage for both baby and myself. But, it isn't that hard...... Frankly speaking, I don't even feel that lonely or wanting to cheat on him.. No, I have no such feelings. AT ALL. I am fine most of the days. Its not that I don't miss my bae. I miss him every second. But, I don't get angry that he has to go thru NS, he has to sleep at 10pm... I don't. So.... I created my own theory to why I feel this way.

First. Maybe, it's because I AM BUSY most of the time. Juggling 3 jobs. Monday Tuesday Sakura AND teaching. Wednesday Thursday Friday Office AND teaching. Saturday and Sunday Sakura AND family. So, I am actually completely occupied. Work all day and by then, it's already 10pm and bae would probably call me at that timing, usually. I don't have time to even socialise with anyone that much..

Secondly... I AM CRAZY FOR MY BOYFRIEND. He's perfect the way he is. And, there is nothing that I wish I could have in him. So, perhaps, thats the reason why I am loyal even when he's in Tekong for the entire 2 weeks. (Insya Allah he's meant for me)

I love being at home, watch my movies, read books, spend time with my family, with bae, with my girlfriends. Its not that I am an anti-social person. (or is it I am?) HAHAHA! Some people loves the crowd, the talks. But, I guess, I prefer being with a small crowd that I am able to count on anytime.... Is it I'm getting older at a faster rate already?

Missing you, bae. Come home soon, love.....